Editor’s Note: Today’s devotional is written by Andy Kim. Andy, a graduate of Northwestern University, is about to complete his M.Div. at Fuller Theological Seminary. He is currently serving as a staff at Radiance Christian Church in San Francisco, CA.
Devotional Thoughts for Today
Nehemiah 1:4-11
As soon as I heard these words I sat down and wept and mourned for days, and I continued fasting and praying before the God of heaven. 5 And I said, “O Lord God of heaven, the great and awesome God who keeps covenant and steadfast love with those who love him and keep his commandments,6 let your ear be attentive and your eyes open, to hear the prayer of your servant that I now pray before you day and night for the people of Israel your servants, confessing the sins of the people of Israel, which we have sinned against you. Even I and my father’s house have sinned. 7 We have acted very corruptly against you and have not kept the commandments, the statutes, and the rules that you commanded your servant Moses. 8 Remember the word that you commanded your servant Moses, saying, ‘If you are unfaithful, I will scatter you among the peoples, 9 but if you return to me and keep my commandments and do them, though your outcasts are in the uttermost parts of heaven, from there I will gather them and bring them to the place that I have chosen, to make my name dwell there.’…
I’m not the biggest fan of politics, but it’s hard not to see how much of it has taken over the news. Even in my limited understanding of the current events, I know that Donald Trump has said some ridiculous things—yet manages to have the support of many people. Many of us are concerned about a man like Donald Trump becoming president, because it would affect us—that’s how we’re trained to think. In any situation we may ask, How does this affect us, or what do I have to gain from this? But what about all the other things that are happening around the world? For example, it is reported that there are over 10,000 refugee children missing in the past two years—some have been criminally exploited and others being unaccounted for. So how do we respond to such news? Maybe we can glean from Nehemiah’s experience.
Nehemiah hears that the people of God have been scattered, unaccounted, and without a wall—leaving them completely vulnerable to their enemies. Remember, he has a plush job as a cupbearer to the king, yet his immediate response is to weep, fast, and pray. My intention is not to make us feel guilty or simply invoke an emotional response; instead, we need to see that Nehemiah’s emotional response led him to a bold prayer. He boldly prays for what seems impossible, and it would eventually lead him to be the catalyst in restoring the people of God. Let’s look at such a prayer: He begins with an appeal to God’s character and authority; an understanding of man’s incapability in confession; an intercession for His people based on His promises; and a call to action.
I am not arguing that all our prayers must sound like this, but we need to be reminded that there is power in prayer that supersedes feelings. In the same way, when we hear or see the brokenness in our world, may we respond with bold prayers! Let us take this day to pray not only for ourselves but for the people in our communities, churches, and nations to do the impossible—in accordance with His Word. E.M. Bounds wrote: “We can do nothing without prayer. All things can be done by importunate prayer. It surmounts or removes all obstacles, overcomes every resisting force and gains its ends in the face of invincible hindrances.”
Prayer
Lord, You are above all and knows all. We humbly trust in Your promises and believe that You care for the broken, the sick, and the lost. We want to intercede for these people, just as You, Jesus, intercede for us. Lord, teach us how to pray for others. Help us to be a generation that prays first, then acts.
Bible Reading for Today: Genesis 50 & Titus 1
While the adherents of capitalism wouldn’t be able to say, “There was not a needy person among [us],” that was the claim long made by the communists. But, once the iron curtain came down in Eastern Europe, we discovered that the communist leaders lived in nicer homes and ate better food, while the needs of the rest were barely met.
While serving in Mexico, I used to hand out evangelistic tracts during my daily jog. After returning to the states, I continued the practice—at least for a time. One day while jogging in a park, I ran by three park workers but felt timid to say anything. So I said to God, “If they’re still there when I return, then I will hand out tracts.” I was hoping that they would be gone by then, but they were still there—and I felt just as nervous. Now, what do I do?
The Oakland Athletics was the last team to win three consecutive World Series from 1972 to 1974. Ironically, although the players feuded among themselves, their common dislike for the team owner Charles Finley brought them together. Similarly, Herod and Pilate, who “had been enemies,” became friends over making sport of Jesus (Lk. 23:11-2). Perhaps that friendship pales in comparison to an alliance formed among Franklin Roosevelt, Winston Churchill and Joseph Stalin during the World War II. While Roosevelt and Churchill must’ve been horrified to later find that Stalin engineered the genocide of millions of people, including the Russian leader in the alliance must have seemed like a good idea since their common enemy was Hitler.
Editor’s Note: The AMI QT Devotionals for February 15-16 are provided by Doug Tritton. Doug, a graduate of University of Pennsylvania, is currently pursuing a M.Div. at Gordon Conwell Seminary while working fulltime. He is married to Cindy and they serve at Symphony Church in Boston. 
When I was in middle school, I had to give a presentation in one of my classes—this was so frightening to me. Never before had I stood before a group of people to give a talk for more than a few seconds. Extremely nervous, I gave my presentation, but unable to really think about what I was saying. Afterwards, I remember my teacher asking me if I even breathed once during my presentation; apparently, I was so nervous that I could not even breathe!
In my current job, I work on the release of tech products. There is much momentum as we work on the hottest new trend and put great effort into launching the product; but then once we finish and release it, there is a lull. Since we are not in sales, we do not know right away how the product is doing in the market—and so all we can do is wait and see.
Here is a sobering thought for Valentine’s Day, a day reserved to celebrate significant others in our lives: Have you ever been used by someone, especially those who are close to you? It’s natural to expect care and concern from those who we think love us, but when we find out we have been used and disregarded, our spirits can sink to the dark depths due to the deeply cutting hurt we suffer (Gaylin, Feelings, 148-164). Former Columbia University psychiatry professor Willard Gaylin insightfully describes the feeling of being used when he writes, “The sense of being used . . . arises from the fear that the person dealing with us is not involved with us in emotional ties and affection—where there may be mutual use—but is simply using us as an instrument, a vehicle of his own purposes. We then are equated with the things in his life. We are signs of his needs, not of his affections.
Sometimes the Bible calls on us to be used: although I doubt Jesus meant in Ma tthew 5:40-1 that we should let thieves steal whatever they want from us because we should never resist. (Hyperbole seems to be in play here.) Nevertheless, Jesus conveys the message that sometimes doing good means letting ourselves be used by others for the glory of God. Jesus should know: while He let Judas to use Him to profit himself materially, Jesus allowed it to profit us spiritually.
Theologian Jack Deere, who lost both his father and son to suicide, wrote, “Time does not heal shame. Shame will not go away by itself. It might be hidden for a little while but sooner or later, it comes back. . . . It’s always there and it tells you this: ‘You know, if these people really knew what you were like, they wouldn’t even want you in this room.’ And because you’ve got this gaping hole you can’t share with anyone, you feel so lonely in the room and like you really need to keep this secret.”
Philosopher Avishai Margalit describes guilt as that reaction when we view ourselves from the eyes of our inner conscience, making us pale, and shame as that emotion when we view ourselves from the eyes of the other, making us blush. In any case, the two serve as a devastating duo in our psyche: they can make us feel dirty, hypocritical, secretive, alone, burdened, despairing. They are the sorrowful children of our aspirations towards the highest moral ideals coupled with the wretchedness of our fallen, sinful selves. While other tortures may come from external forces, the torture of guilt and shame can be an especially painful assault as it comes from within. I once heard a young man, who had actually overcome his sin of masturbating to pornography, confess, “I don’t know which is harder: stopping porn or dealing with the guilt that I’ve had since stopping.”
We want to be a good person, yet, we fail in so many ways. And it frustrates us to no end; evidently, that’s how Paul felt as well. We want to forgive or stop our sexual sin, yet we find ourselves not being who we want to be. For many, this routine of failure can cause painful questioning: Is God even with me? How can I live with these feelings of self-doubt, loathing, and shame? Am I even a Christian? How can I change?
And that was the experience of a pastor who finally found freedom from years of torturous struggle with strip clubs and pornography. He confessed: “I cannot tell you why I had to endure ten years of near-possession before being ready for deliverance…. But what I can tell you, especially those of you who have hung on every turn of my own pilgrimage because it so closely corresponds to yours, is that God did come through for me. The phrase may sound heretical, but to me, after so many years of failure, it felt as if he had suddenly decided to be there after a long absence. I prayed, hid nothing (hide nothing from God?), and he heard me.”
In the pit of “momentary affliction,” there is the struggle for meaning, answers, comfort, God; the darkness covers us. Jesus is the light, but sometimes, Jesus does not take away the pain—the cancer is still there, the job is still lost, our loved ones are still dead.